Thursday, November 27, 2008

Adventures in Yaletown

So I've finally, in the past two weeks, gotten myself a real job and a regular schedule. No paycheque yet, but one day that will come in and I can stop panicking about my visa bill. My mother, brilliant as she is, says to me: "Welcome to the real world." Thanks mom. Does this mean I have to cut back my drinking? Again?

Anyway, the job, receptionist at two different yoga studios, is brilliant. It's full of cool people, there's no gross food to deal with (though the occasional yoga mat so sweaty it drips on its way to the cleaning room--ew. Pools of sweat.), and I get FREE yoga at this beautiful yoga studio.

This morning, I woke up feeling a little gross and overtired. So I took a quick skytrain over to the big, beautiful studio in Burnaby, took a Power Vinyasa class, and then sat in the infrared sauna for a few minutes. It was HOT in there. Apparently infrared heat is supposed to go straight to your core, detoxifying you more than a usual steam sauna. I can't speak for other saunas because I'm a bit of a noob in the territory, but I felt awesome after, and couldn't wipe the smile off my face. Sat and had some tea with my lovely manager Debbie and a yoga teacher named Melissa, and felt much revived.

I also, however, work at a studio in Yaletown, the richest, yuppiest neighborhood in Vancouver. Yaletown people are notoriously self-righteous and bitchy, and carry dogs around everywhere with them. I got to my shift a little early, and took a walk around the neighbourhood. I passed by a store that sells nothing but $350 cartoon paintings of cats. Then a place that will wash and blow dry your hair. For $200. In half an hour. Amazing that these yaletown women have so much money and time that they spend it all on blowjobs. (badoom-ching!)

Sure enough, at my job I've encountered quite a few yaletown people. The surprise is that they are the YOGA TEACHERS. It's amazing--the clientele has been generally really nice and cool, and a couple of the yoga teachers (not all--most of them are really great) were just incredibly irritable and bitchy, getting stressed about the tiniest things. It's amazing what Yaletown can do to people.

More stories of my adventures in yaletown to come, I'm sure.

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